Chapter 103 : Chapter 103 Laws of Rejoicing on Yom Tov

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§1

Just as it is a mitzvah to honor the Shabbos and delight in it, so it is a mitzvah to honor all the Yomim Tovim and delight in them, as it is said,¹Isaiah 58:13. This verse mentions taking delight in Shabbos, God’s holy day. "God's holy and honored" (day). And with regard to all Yomim Tovim it is said, "A holy convocation."²Yom Tov is, therefore, like Shabbos in this regard. (Rambam)

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§2

What is meant by honor? As our Rabbis, of blessed memory, said, "It is a mitzvah for a man to take a haircut on erev Yom Tov so that he does not enter the festival looking untidy. It is also a mitzvah to bathe in warm water, to wash your hair, and to cut your nails on erev Yom Tov, the same as on erev Shabbos. It is also a mitzvah to bake challos in your house on erev Yom Tov in honor of Yom Tov, just as it is on erev Shabbos. It is forbidden to³Ramah 529:1. The term forbidden is not to be taken literally, for it is not forbidden; it is just better not to eat then. (Mishnah Berurah, Eliyahu Rabbah) eat⁴See Rambam. This includes doing work. (Eliyahu Rabbah, Biur Halachah 529:1) on erev Yom Tov after⁵This refers to Minchah Ketanah which starts 9-1/2 hours into the day. (Mishnah Berurah, Eliyahu Rabbah, Vilna Gaon) You should not eat a meal from a half an hour before this time. (Biur Halachah, Shulchan Aruch Harav) The Ramah 639:3 and Chok Yaakov 471 rule that on erev Sukkos you may not eat bread from noon onward. The Matteh Ephraim rules, if you were unable to eat before noon, you may eat bread before noon. Minchah,⁶You may eat meat, fish,or fruit even after Minchah ketanah. Even on erev Sukkos and erev Pesach. (Matteh Ephraim 625:7) just as on erev Shabbos, so that you will be able to eat the Yom Tov meal with good appetite. And if erev Yom Tov occurs on Shabbos, you must eat the third meal before Minchah ketanah.⁷If you did not, you should eat only a little bread, that is slightly more than a kebeitzah (see glossary). (Machatzis Hashekel, Sha’ar Hatziyun 529:10) This law also applies to the first day of Yom Tov, since it is the eve of the second day of Yom Tov.⁸Magein Avraham. See Biur Halachah 529:1 who questions this.

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§3

What is meant by delight? As our Rabbis, of blessed memory, said on each Yom Tov day you must have two meals, one at night and one during the day,⁹If you did not eat at night, you must eat two meals during the day and say the night kiddush at the morning meal. (see Magein Avraham, Mishnah Berurah 529:13) but it is not our custom to have a third meal.¹⁰Some Acharonim hold it is best to eat at least some fruit. Some people add an extra dish in the morning meal to represent a third meal. However, this does not suffice for the third meal on Shabbos. (Mishnah Berurah 529:13) You are obligated to say kiddush over a cup of wine before the meal. You should say Hamotzi on two whole loaves as you do on Shabbos,¹¹Shulchan Aruch 529: Because a double portion of manna was sent down on erev Yom Tov, as on erev Shabbos. (Beis Yosef, Rif) and you should be lavish with meat, wine and sweets, according to your means.

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§4

On every Yom Tov, at the conclusion of the kiddush at night we say the berachah of Shehecheyanu on the joy of the holiday, except on the seventh and eighth nights of Pesach when shehecheyanu is omitted, since they are not a separate Yom Tov in themselves. When lighting the candles, women should not say the berachah shehecheyanu on any Yom Tov. Some women follow the custom of saying shehecheyanu on all Yomim Tovim (except on the seventh and eighth nights of Pesach), and we do not protest their practice.

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§5

Every man is obligated to gladden the hearts¹²Rejoicing is an obligation on Chol Hamoed also, but, honoring and taking delight is only an obligation of the actual Yom Tov. (Shulchan Aruch Harav, Mishnah Berurah 529:16) of his wife, his children, and all who are dependent on him, in a way suitable for each. To the little children you should give nuts and candy, to the women,¹³This is the husband’s obligation, but women are not commanded to rejoice on Yom Tov and may even fast if they want to. (Rabbi Akiva Eiger Responsum 1) But Sha’agas Aryeh rules that women, too, are obligated to rejoice on Yom Tov. Toras Avigdor says they are forbidden to fast on Yom Tov. clothing and jewelry according to your means,¹⁴At least new shoes. (Eliyahu Rabbah, Maharil, Biur Halachah) and to the men, meat and wine.¹⁵In our times, when our meat is not from a shelamim offering (peace-offering), eating meat is a mitzvah and drinking wine an obligation. (Biur Halachah 529:2, Shulchan Aruch Harav 529:7) Chayei Adam rules that even now, you may fulfill your obligation with meat or wine. It is the custom to serve a greater variety of foods on Yom Tov than on Shabbos, because with regard to Yom Tov, the Torah mentions "rejoicing," but it is not mentioned with regard to Shabbos. Also Yom Tov clothes should be more expensive than Shabbos clothes.

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§6

On the second day of Pesach, you should add an extra dish to the meal to remember the feast of Esther which took place on this day, for it was on this day that Haman was hanged.

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§7

On the first day of Shavuos it is customary to eat dairy foods. There are several reasons for this. A hint of this custom is found in the words, Minchah chadashah LaShem beshavuoseichem.¹⁶Numbers 25:26. The initials of these words spell meichalav—"of milk." You should also eat foods with honey, because the Torah is compared to milk and honey, as it is said,¹⁷Shir Hashirim 4:11. "Honey and milk are under your tongue." Now, since we eat dairy foods and we must also eat meat, because it is a mitzvah to eat meat on every Yom Tov, care must be taken not to violate the law of mixing the dairy and meat foods.

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§8

Even though eating and drinking on festivals is a positive commandment, you should not spend all day eating and drinking, because it is said, "(A day of) restraint (in honor) of Adonoy, your God." Even though it is said, "(A day of) restraint it shall be for you," our Rabbis, of blessed memory, explained:¹⁸Maseches Beitzah 15. The day should be divided, half devoted to Hashem and half to yourself. Therefore, it is your duty to engage also in the study of Torah.

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§9

And when you eat and drink, it is your duty to provide also for the orphan, the widow and other needy people, as it is said, "And the Levite, the proselyte, and the orphan etc…." (Deuteronomy 16:14). He who locks the doors of his courtyard, and eats and drinks with his wife and children and does not give food and drink to the poor and unhappy souls, is not rejoicing in a mitzvah, but rejoicing in his gluttony. Concerning such people it is said,¹⁹Hosea 9:4. "Their sacrifices will be to them like the bread of mourners; all who eat of them will be unclean; for their bread will be for their souls." And such rejoicing is a disgrace for them as it is said,²⁰Malachi 2:3. "I will spread dung on your faces, the dung of your festival offerings."

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§10

When a person eats and drinks, and rejoices on the festival, he should not overindulge in drinking wine, in laughter and lightheadedness, thinking that the more he indulges, the greater will be the mitzvah of rejoicing. For drunkenness, mockery and lightheadedness is not rejoicing, but licentiousness and foolishness. And we were not commanded to act licentiously and foolishly, but to rejoice in the service of the Creator of all things, as it is said, "Because you did not serve Adonoy, your God, with happiness and a glad heart, when you had plenty of everything."²¹Deuteronomy 28:47. From this we infer that the service of God must be done with joy, but you cannot serve God in frivolity, or lightheadness or in drunkenness.

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§11

It is the way of the pious, who constantly have God before them, and who are mindful of Him in all their ways, when they rejoice, to greatly bless and praise the Holy One Blessed is He Who enabled them to rejoice. A man should say to himself at the time of his rejoicing and pleasure, "If the happiness of this world is so great, (a world) which is vanity because it ends in grief and sorrow, how great will be the eternal joy of the World to Come which is not followed by grief." And he should pray to the Holy One Blessed is He that He bend his heart to serve Him and to do His will wholeheartedly, and that He should gladden us with everlasting joy, and make us worthy of the life of the World to Come, to be enlightened by the light of the presence of the Living King.

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§12

Every man is obligated to prevent²²When Beis Din (Jewish courts) were empowered, it was their duty to dispatch officers to patrol and prevent the gathering of men and women for social eating and drinking etc. (Rambam, Shulchan Aruch 529:4) the members of his household from congregating in places which, Heaven forbid, could lead to levity, through association with lightheaded people. They should be encouraged to be holy because the day is holy.

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§13

At the conclusion of a Yom Tov that is followed by a weekday or Chol Hamoed, Atah chonantanu is said in the Shemoneh Esrei, and Havdalah is said over a cup [of wine.] However, the berachah is not said over the candle, or over the spices.

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§14

It is customary to eat and drink a bit more lavishly [than usual] on the day after all three festivals. That day is called Isru chag, and it is customary not to fast on that day. Even a groom and bride on their wedding day [do not fast], and a person observing yahrzeit [should also not fast on Isru chag]. On Isru chag following Shavuos, even according to halachah, it is forbidden to fast, because when the Beis Hamikdash was in existence, if Shavuos occurred on Shabbos, the sacrifices were offered on the following day. But on Pesach and Sukkos, they were offered on the first day of Chol Hamoed.